Throw Back Blog Post
I wrote this last year but wanted to share it again on my Celebrate Maryland/Travel Maryland series. Enjoy :)
I took a little vacation to Ocean City, MD with my husband and his family. Ocean City is a peninsula located on the Eastern Shore of Maryland, connected by Delaware. It consists of about 150 streets and although it is quite urbanized with huge hotels, a big boardwalk, rides, and many bars/restaurants, Ocean City still maintains that water town charm with its beautiful quiet bayside and friendly Eastern Shore folks. It is practically a second home to my husband and me as we both grew up swimming in its ocean, have family in the surrounding area, and got engaged there.
During this trip in particular, I wrote one of my favorite journal entries that I would like to share with the world. I keep a Travel Journal that I take with me whenever Ryan and I go on a little trip or a vacation. I make a point to write in it every day harvesting little details of trips that are often forgotten and feelings that I have while at my most relaxed state. If you do not have a travel journal, I highly recommend starting one. It is so nice to read during times of stress; it transports you back to better times and remembering what is most important...
"Let me start off by conveying that I am 8 months pregnant. Infact the last entry I wrote in Cancun is likely when we conceived. I can't believe its been 8 months. Time is a funny thing. It really is relative. It seems to go by so fast when we have a sense of it. When we were young, we didn't think about time much. We just lived in the moment; what we were doing today or maybe tomorrow. But we didn't constantly think about time like adults do. We didn't make plans years in advance or think about our impeding old age. I think that is what makes time go faster, thinking about it too much.
I am currently sitting on the porch watching the sunrise, a slight breeze wisps through my hair and the temperature is just right. It's early. I woke up at 4:30 am today. I don't sleep much anymore. Can't say that I mind it too much. I've always loved the early morning transition from night to day. It is actually probably my favorite time. There is something about the cool night air and mystery mixing with the beauty, warmth and light of dawn.
A seagull squawks and reminds me to stay focused on what I want to write about. Until this moment, I had been feeling like this vacation may be a little hard for me, after all I am 8 months pregnant at the beach during one of the hottest summers of the century. I had just accepted that it may not be the most relaxing and fun vacation for me this year. But then, not to long ago, as I sat with my coffee, book and pencil, felt the wind in my hair and the sounds of the gulls, I realized - this could be one of the best vacations I ever have.
This is a time to connect with the real me. That child who loved the beach because of the way it made her feel. I remember I used to sit on the beach right at the shoreline where the water just barely rolled over my toes and I would watch the horizon for hours. I would feel peace. I remember playing in the ocean, riding my boogie board in over and over. I would feel alive. I remember putting on a sweatshirt at night over my tan and slightly burnt shoulders with salty hair and heading to the boardwalk for a few hours. I felt excitement.
As I got older, the beach turned into something else for me. It turned into a place to meet people, go out, drink, dance, and party! It turned into a place to be with my friends and enjoy my adolescence. The beach grew with me and was first my childhood and then my teenage accomplice for many years. But that time is over now, a new era is here. The cycle is returning back around. I've grown up and am now about to give birth to a little boy who will also go through the same cycle as I did. Not only is this little boy being born, so am I.
This vacation is meant to show me how to feel at peace and alive during this new stage in my life; something I have been struggling with. I've been feeling a little nervous about becoming a parent and I've been feeling a little sad about realizing my youth really is over now. I think many people struggle with the end of an era in their lives until the realize and accept the truth - life is a cycle, and an end only means that there is another beginning about to start.
This vacation at this time represents the end and beginning of a cycle. This vacation is a death and a birth. This vacation is the moment in-between when dusk turns to dawn, my favorite part of the day..."
